How to give yourself away properly #100sharesproject 11/100

 

Everyone has his own specific vocation or mission in life; everyone must carry out a concrete assignment that demands fulfillment. Therein he cannot be replaced, nor can his life be repeated, thus, everyone's task is unique as his specific opportunity to implement it. Viktor E. Frankl

Everyone has his own specific vocation or mission in life; everyone must carry out a concrete assignment that demands fulfillment. Therein he cannot be replaced, nor can his life be repeated, thus, everyone’s task is unique as his specific opportunity to implement it.  ~Viktor E. Frankl~

Friday 29 April 2016

11/100

I wrote the following letter in response to a dear one who wanted to know about using journals for coaching and leading and spiritual practice.  While I am passionate about using journals in all sorts of ways, when I was writing to her, something more universal emerged.  Since this project is all about sharing, here is Share No. 11.  A letter and a work in progress.

Remember, no one will do this exactly like you do.  No one.  You’ll watch me and others you admire do what they do and it will be tempting to try and replicate.  Learn from them, but do not create templates that do not accommodate your true self.  The biggest piece of advice that I can give you has nothing to do with using journals or the specifics of leadership tools and principles.  It’s this:  

Know who you are and what you have to give away in this season.  

Be fierce about what you know.

Your assignment may be your children for a season. That is no small thing.  Settle in and love where you are.  Perhaps your current task at hand is manifesting a specific product or showing up to a job that requires you to be focused on an action list in a focused way.  All of those can be valid assignments.

Listen carefully and don’t act unless you know that you know that you know.   

Don’t give yourself away lightly.

First and foremost ask:

What do I really have to give?

Take a true inventory of what you can give.  And before you give, be sure of this:

A.  That you’ve tended to your own soul.

and

B.  That you taken care of your family, even if that’s just you.

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One of the most important gifts that you will give the people in your sphere is knowing where you stop and start.

They will learn the most from you as you live out boundaries and health.  They will listen to the words you use.  They will observe whether or not you keep your word.  They will watch the way that you do and don’t draw boundaries. Those are the most important pieces.

When you model how to show up to your life with integrity, you gain authority.

Show up to your life.  Your current life.  BE in your life.

Betsy

By | 2016-10-19T14:20:29+00:00 April 29th, 2016|Uncategorized|4 Comments

About the Author:

I create containers for words and paint and I fill them. I craft safe, sacred spaces for people to wrestle, create, heal and shout from the mountain tops.
 
And I teach people to do all of these things for themselves.

  • Katie Swan

    These posts have quickly become the highlight of my inbox. Such life changing truth. Love this.

    • Katie Swan – You are one of my favorite humans. You serve humanity like no one I’ve ever known. You are a gift to the world. With your keen eye for what needs to be done and huge heart, knowing where you stop and start is vital. Tend to your own soul as faithfully as you serve the world. Love you, Bird.

  • best advice for anyone ( especially women … especially moms) … don’t give yourself away lightly. I am thinking in particular that this is something I want my daughter, my Katie, to know. She invests so deeply in people with little return. What return she does has, is good return but at the same time, I have seen her brushed aside too often. She shrugs her shoulders and accepts.

    her car broke down, unrepairable. and we were going to help her look for another one. I was asking her some questions about what she wanted, and I could see her shrugging her shoulders, as she replied, “it doesn’t really matter” …. but it does. and I told her that.

    she ended up buying a brand new car. Not something we always recommend but it is a good choice for her now and with the warranty and extended warranty she put on it, she won’t have to deal with car repairs. there will be ease. she needs ease. and her car is awesome and the best part is that I am so glad she is investing in something wonderful for herself, not just settling for left overs. she deserves it.

    • “She shrugs her shoulders and accepts.”

      That’s it. We do that until our neck won’t move and our heart aches. I LOVE that you spoke the truth of value. I could see your words collecting over her head like a cloud and then breaking open with light that got caught in her hair and made it’s way into her heart. Drive that brand new car Katie-girl!! Ease. Investment in self. Value. Not settling. So good. Now she can serve out of overflow. #lifepoints to the mum.